So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
