Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Randomize
