Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
Randomize
