Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Randomize
