You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
Randomize
