i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Randomize
