I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
