i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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