dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
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