She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
