Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
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