I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
Randomize
