I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
Randomize
