I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Randomize
