oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
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