just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
Randomize
