STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
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