Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
Randomize