help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
He left a cum stain in the shape of a heart on my sheets.
He's like the Bob Ross of love stains.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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