Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Randomize
