i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
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