when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
He literally asked permission to hit on me
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
