Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
There are leaves in my underwear?
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
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