Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
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My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
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I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
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