O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
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