Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
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