Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
