We're facebook friends in real life
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
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