I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
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