They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
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