i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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