He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
Randomize
