Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
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