He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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