doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize