Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
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We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
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I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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