i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
So here I am, sexting at work.
Randomize
