Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
