You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
Randomize
