Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
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