You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
