I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill?
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
Randomize
