i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
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