Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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