Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
Just took my morning after pill in the library
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
Randomize
