It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
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