sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
Randomize