I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
Randomize