I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Randomize
