Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
